chris kluwe
Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies: On Myths, Morons, Free Speech, Football, and Assorted Absurdities
Featured in:
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"The most interesting man in the N.F.L." —The New York Times
“Intelligent and thought-provoking, Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies is relentlessly honest; Kluwe pulls no punches, spares no language and writes a rip-roaring debut.” — Shelf Awareness
From Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe comes an uproarious, uncensored take on empathy, personal responsibility, and what it means to be human.
Chris Kluwe came to prominence when his blistering, hilarious Deadspin letter defending free speech and marriage equality received more than 2.3 million views and made news around the world. Now, the punishingly funny writer and fearless champion of personal freedom takes on everyone and everything else in Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies.
In this collection of rousing, uncensored personal essays, Kluwe unleashes against intolerance, the misinterpretation of religion, guns, athletes' salaries, and the Pope while also considering time travel, the pay-per-view future of in-helmet cameras, and the end of the world. An enemy of bad behavior, Kluwe is an emerging voice in the fight against stupidity and ignorance everywhere.
A former NFL player, Chris Kluwe has received wide attention for his controversial political essays and his TED talk on the future of technology, virtual reality, and empathy. Kluwe is the author of the acclaimed political essay collection Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies (Little, Brown); a contributor to the anthology Press Start To Play (Vintage); co-author, with Andrew Reiner, of the novel Prime: A Genesis Series Event; and the lead designer of the tabletop card game TWILIGHT OF THE GODS. He has been profiled in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, USA Today and Salon, and has appeared on The Colbert Report, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, NPR Weekend Edition, and Ellen.
Published by Little, Brown, Little, Brown UK, and Hachette Audio in June, 2013.
Photo of Chris Kluwe by David Bowman, www.bowmanstudio.com
More praise for Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies:
“In mixing the profane with the prophetic while using a variety of literary devices, the author succeeds at being both entertaining and enlightening. An intriguing assortment of work from an athlete with a lot on his mind.” — Kirkus Reviews
“The quirky and sometimes pugnacious ex-punter for the Vikings reveals a little more about his views on social issues, and a lot more about himself, his career and how his frenetic and far-ranging mind works....Kluwe proves himself to be, indeed, a man for all season--not just football season.”
— The Minneapolis Star Tribune
“In a league (and sports climate) which has become one, long, repetitive sound bite, a guy who will actually say something meaningful.”
— BleacherReport.com
“Chris Kluwe is a glimmering sparklepony of candor (and not afraid to dive fearlessly into the marriage equality debate).” — Mother Jones
“It's a strongly worded, profanity laced political and philosophical manifesto from an unlikely new pundit: pro football player Chris Kluwe ... Mr. Kluwe's particular talent as a prose stylist lies in his creative use of inventive swear words.” — The Wall Street Journal's "Speakeasy"
“Kluwe is a genuine iconoclast.... Kluwe's writing makes for an entertaining read. He's as adept at the art of the take-down... but he is capable of toning it down when he has to.... His words present compelling arguments on myriad deep and unsolvable, yet relentlessly fascinating problems.”
— The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
“Kluwe is a brainy loudmouth dyspeptic idealistic pessimistic utopian punter/gay rights activist/champion of free speech/family guy who plays guitar. He's sort of Charles Barkley meets Bill "Spaceman" Lee--but with more gravitas.” — ESPN.com
“Kluwe's combination of passion and intelligent self-deprecation has resulted in some must-read stuff....Kluwe is a talented writer with plenty to say. He just happens to kick footballs for a living.” — The Maine Edge
“Chris Kluwe writes much better than I can punt.” — John Scalzi, award-winning author of Old Man's War and Redshirts
Otaku: A novel
"An impressively nasty-ass future Miami, a smart female protagonist, and plenty of action, both real and virtual." —William Gibson
Ditchtown. A city of skyscrapers, built atop the drowned bones of old Miami. A prison of steel, filled with unbelievers. A dumping ground for strays, runaways and malcontents.
Within these towering monoliths, Ashley Akachi is a young woman trying her best to cope with a brother who's slipping away, a mother who's already gone, and angry young men who want her put in her place. Ditchtown, however, is not the only world Ash inhabits.
Within Infinite Game, a virtual world requiring physical perfection, Ash is Ashura the Terrible, leader of the Sunjewel Warriors, loved, feared, and watched by millions across the globe. Haptic chambers, known as hapspheres, translate their every move in the real to the digital - and the Sunjewel Warriors' feats are legendary.
But Ash is about to stumble upon a deadly conspiracy that will set her worlds crashing together…
And in the real, you only get to die once.
Published by Tor/Macmillan in March 2020.
More praise for Otaku:
"Kluwe’s well-crafted fiction debut, an old-school cyberpunk adventure, brings the thrills of virtual reality combat into the real world while taking aim at the racist and sexist abuses that pervade contemporary gamer culture… Kluwe’s complex near-future politics are convincingly rendered, and fight scenes featuring the team blasting and blitzing its way through government buildings with missiles and swords will appeal to video game fans…a solidly entertaining romp.” — Publishers Weekly
"Ash’s voice and perspective are the main driving forces of the book, and her narration—especially of action and anger—is riveting in its competence and bleak desperation. Thematically, Ash’s repeated mantra of “just another encounter” when confronting danger in the real world is very moving, and speaks powerfully to how games—in fiction and outside it—make life’s difficulties bearable. Kluwe’s prose is also often startlingly beautiful…..” — The New York Times
"Readers may be initially drawn to outspoken former football player Kluwe's debut novel because of his name, but Ashley's courage and strong opinions will win their hearts.” — Booklist (starred review)
"Chris Kluwe’s Otaku is that most delicious combination: a novel of big, important ideas that’s also an exhilarating read. Too many of our pop culture-fueled sci-fi fantasies perpetuate the false notion that white men rightly hold dominion over that cultural territory. With Otaku, Kluwe smashes that notion to bits with an exhilarating thrill ride that doubles as an ideological sledgehammer—a thrilling tale full of the kinds of heroes we both need and deserve.” ― Anita Sarkeesian, founder of Feminist Frequency
"Ass-kicking and desperate, bleakness and rebellion arm-wrestling for all the marbles in a slim, sharp narrative―Otaku speedruns the future." ― Max Gladstone, author of How to Lose the Time War